Mari Leigh
Trauma & Mindset Coach, Somatic Energy Healer
Mari Leigh is a trauma and mindset coach, quantum energy healer, and Akashic Record reader working with women to help them heal their past, connect to their highest selves, and create their dream lives.
With a track record of building three successful businesses and supporting hundreds of entrepreneurs, she understands the complexities of overcoming obstacles and embracing growth. Through her unique blend of modalities, she helps women on areas such as finances, confidence, self-worth, and feminine embodiment, unlocking the keys to fulfillment and joy.
Connect with Mari...
Website: Https://marileigh.com
Instagram: Https://instagram.com/marileighb
Full Transcript - Episode 25
Chantelle: Mari, as a five line... how do you discern between what lights you up versus what someone has asked you to do or someone has imposed or volunteered
you to do?
Mari: Oh, absolutely. I feel like that's something that one, comes a lot from my intuition and also comes with following my decision making process of my human design profile, because I'm a person who I need to take the time to process and tune into things I cannot just give an answer or like have a gut response really quickly.
I will usually have a feeling of something, but it still takes me a while to get to a conclusion. And I really have to take space away from what everybody else [00:02:00] is telling me what they think I should be doing or what, what they feel like it's best for me, because I do think oftentimes people kind of draw conclusions.
With the five profile, of like what they think is best for me or who I think they think I am when they don't really know me. Yeah. So I have to really, it's something I had to work really hard on to get to that place of not caring what other people think of following my own intuition and what I feel like is aligned and that's something, especially in my business was really hard. I did marketing for a long time and it was one of those things that everybody told me I was good at it, but I hated it.
I was so frustrated, which again, like frustration and comes back to my human design of when things aren't aligned, I get frustrated. And it wasn't something I was, it didn't make me happy. And when I started doing what I do now, that's when I was really like, this feels so aligned. I'm doing what I feel like I need to be [00:03:00] following.
I feel like it really comes down to like knowing yourself, knowing your own intuition and knowing your worth and being able to stand up for that and say no to the people and the things that are trying to distract you from what you're supposed to be doing.
Chantelle: Yeah. It sounds like you've almost had a complicated relationship with like well meaning advice.
Mari: Yes. Absolutely. We have our zones of excellence, right? People want us to be in our zone of excellence, but we want to be in our zone of genius and oftentimes people don't see our zones of genius because they just think like, Oh, like you're so naturally great at marketing.
Why wouldn't you do marketing? Yeah.
Chantelle: Can you tell a story of a time when someone came to their own conclusions about you without really knowing you?
Mari: Yeah. Even so, even with what I do now. Everything I do is very spiritual energetic based, obviously, if I do quantum energy healing in the Akashic records and different things. And so [00:04:00] people will hear about me from someone. And this happened actually with one of my good friends and her partner.
So I met her partner for the first time. And he was in shock when I left and he told my friend, he was like, you know, I actually really like Mari. And she was like, what do you mean? Did you not think that you would like her? Like, do you think that I'm hanging out with people that are like, I don't know.
And he was like, well, I just didn't think that she would be normal. Like, I didn't think I'd be able to have a conversation with her. Cause all I know about her is that she's spiritual. And he was just in such awe and people like, don't expect that from me now with what I do, they expect me to be like this totally woo woo person, and then they actually get to know me and they're like, Oh my gosh, you're really different than what I thought.
Even just knowing what I do, they could just have that one sentence and they immediately have this idea and perception of what I do. What I'm like,
Chantelle: Right. [00:05:00] And so with the five , you know, that you get projected on a lot. But you mentioned to me that you actually think that it also comes a little bit from the two.
Can you speak to that?
Mari: Yeah. So for me, it's really interesting because with the five, I, it kind of, it does have a lot of people projecting their own stuff onto you, which in some ways is really good. In some ways, it's really bad because in some ways it really inspires people to make changes in their lives, where.
They're unhappy because they see you doing things and they're like, I want to do that too. But then in other ways, it really triggers them. So it can go one of two directions with it. Yeah. And with the two line, I feel like that is something where, like when I go into my solitude and my hermit ,
it almost like draws people in more. Hmm. It's, it's like the more that I sit in my two, the more people want to like, [00:06:00] grasp on and .
Chantelle: Oh, that's fascinating.
Mari: It's, it's very interesting and it's kind of hard to explain, but it's just like the more, because the more in solitude that I am, the more almost in alignment that I am.
And so it's like the more that they're drawn into you, and then also like because you're in solitude, the more that they're also coming to assumptions and conclusions and then writing stories and projecting, right? So it works very hand in hand with each other.
Chantelle: So is there like opening the floodgates kind of situation when you emerge from that solitude?
Mari: There can be, for me, really, I try to balance it, and it probably used to be a little more drastic. So, for me, like, if I know I'm going to do a couple of things, like, today, then I really set aside time to have my solitude and to reset. Or if I have, like, a big weekend, then, I might need a few days.
Whereas it used to probably be a little bit more of like, I might need more like a month or [00:07:00] two or whatever it was to go into that solitude.
But now that I've learned more about my human design, I can use it more to my advantage so that I know, okay, it doesn't have to go to that extreme.
If I'm where I'm like overdoing it. I'm over socializing, putting myself out there so much, and then I'm completely drained and burnt out and exhausted, and it takes a lot longer to recover. So now that I know my human design better, I can use that more to my advantage.
Chantelle: What are some of your tells of, you know, okay, I'm about to tip over into too much peopling territory.
I really should have already been hermiting. How do you know that?
Mari: I can feel it in my body. Like it is a visceral feeling. I think some people, you know, they talk about like your social batteries or hitting a wall, different things like that. It's very similar. And like, yes, I can always push through.
I would not say that I'm like a quote unquote introvert. Like I kind of am, but I don't need to be an introvert when I don't want to be an [00:08:00] introvert. But then when I go into hermit mode, I'm like full on introvert exclusion. Nobody talk to me.
Chantelle: And so what does that look like for you? Is that just like being alone in a room?
Or like, what are your personal practices around solitude? How does that express itself?
Mari: I love, I love being alone. Honestly, it's like, even when, so when COVID started, I went into and stayed at a cabin in the woods for like three months. I didn't see people for like two months. And so many individuals are like, I could never do that.
Are you kidding me? And I'm like, oh my God, it was the best time of my life. I just got to be totally alone. And it was amazing. So I love being alone. I love, you know, turning my phone off journaling just having space and quiet to self reflect to be in nature.
For me when I, I'll get into those moments more of my five were like, Oh, I'm bored, I want to reach out to all these people, and I'll like, reach out to a bunch of [00:09:00] people and then a few more hours goes by and they all start responding to me and I'm like, Oh, this is too much.
I take it back. I'm going into hermit again.
Chantelle: That's the worst when you finally clear your inbox and then a bunch of those people actually reply back. You're like, No, what have I done?
Mari: Yep. You're like, I just got rid of these messages.
Chantelle: What a unique experience to have.
I'm surprised actually at how many people come on the show and mention lockdown and mentioned COVID. I don't know. It's just like, I didn't expect it to come up so much in conversation, but it really, really has.
And your experience is extremely unique that you followed that part of your design and made that choice. That's really interesting.
Mari: Yeah, I loved it. I like did yoga every day and went on mile long walks in the woods, and just got to live my life with myself. It was the best.
Chantelle: Yeah. What was it like coming back in after that, when you called yourself back in?
Mari: Sometimes it can be a little [00:10:00] overwhelming. It's an adjustment period where If I'm around a lot of people, then I still have to like, okay, I really need to make sure I'm taking the space for myself. I do need to go on walks and have my time. Maybe I'm going to bed early, but really I'm like sitting in bed for an hour and I'm reading or I'm journaling or I'm doing whatever I want to do by myself.
I have just never been the person who like wants to be surrounded by people 24 seven.
Chantelle: How do you work that into your offerings with your business? How do you structure it so that you have that time and you know you're working in the right
energy.?
Mari: Yeah. I, for my offerings have it so that it's not something where my clients have unlimited access to me.
If they do have messaging access, it's only through
like specific hours, specific weeks. And I tell them like, you are not going to get an immediate response. I think I have it in our contract that it's usually like within two to three days or something. Usually it's within 24 hours, but I know that with my design, sometimes if I [00:11:00] am having a really crazy work week and I have a lot of calls, then it's really hard for me to be able to respond to messages.
And I also have our calls set up not only for me, but for our clients so that we're really only having calls usually every two or three weeks, maybe even once a month, because one for me, I need more of that. And also for them, because the work that I do is. There needs to be a longer integration period.
Yeah. So my clients need to also have that time and space in order to actually integrate and not just be like bypassing stuff.
It's interesting actually, because the two line can be expressed as this need to have time to process ideas and process information and integrate. So it sounds like that really rings true for you in your process.
Chantelle: How do you work that? How do you teach clients how to do that if maybe that doesn't come naturally to them?
Mari: It's so different for every client. Sometimes I have to really remind them and get them to slow down and bring it to their [00:12:00] attention. And I will have clients who they finish a package and they're like, this was amazing.
Now I want to do this, this, and this. And I have to tell them like, no, I'm sorry. I'm not letting you do another package. If you want to do another package, come back in three months. And they're like, what do you, what do you mean? Like, take my money. Right. Like, no, I want you to go and integrate. And then sure enough, three, four or five months later, they'll reach out and they'll be like, I'm so glad that you made me do that.
Because there's no way, like none of this would have happened if I needed that. I'm like, yes, I know.
Chantelle: Wow. What a cool
way for that to express.
Mari: Yeah.
It's really unique. They're all different. I mean, sometimes I have to really get them to reflect and journal and I'll be like, send me a voice message with your reflections if that's how you reflect best, but I want them to integrate.
And I have to still give myself that reminder. Like the past week has been insane for [00:13:00] me. And four times a day, I'm having to sit down and do reflection so that I can keep processing what's happening and not just. Because otherwise we're not actually anchoring into that change and we're just going to miss it.
Chantelle: Yeah. And does that reflection for you, does that look like journaling or is that listening to your inner voice? What's your most effective way for you personally to process and reflect?
Mari: It's different depending on my season. I used to hate journaling and right now I'm in this season where I love to journal, which is hilarious because I usually am like telling my clients, I'm like, I hate journaling.
But right now I really do like journaling. Sometimes it just looks like sitting down with a cup of tea and being present in the moment and like letting everything just absorb and sink into my body. So it looks different. I feel like I do it multiple ways, honestly, every day, but being able to get your thoughts out there in some way, shape, or form, whether [00:14:00] that is making a voice memo, like doing a, sometimes I'll like otter transcribe myself, just talking or making a video.
Yeah. Making a video journaling. Like I always tell people, like, even in, you know, mindset work, if you're in a thought loop, you need to release it from you somehow you need to get it out.
And I do the best personally processing things when I speak. So if I verbalize it, it happens a lot quicker. So even though like, I'm really liking journaling right now, I feel like it's more just to make myself slow down.
But it's still not giving me the actual like process and breakthroughs like speaking out loud does.
Chantelle: Interesting. I relate to that. I'm also like not a journaler, but I've been going to these events this month related to the moon. So I went to a new moon and a full moon one, and both of them had journal prompts. And I was like, Oh, I thought I was just going to get to come here and do the meditation.
And like, that was it. But no, I journal. But I'm trying to embrace it because I figure the [00:15:00] universe wants me to journal for a reason. But it's not my natural mode either. I totally agree with you on speaking. That's why I turned on the connection between Otter and Zoom.
Because I will say something during a client call or during a coffee chat or during whatever that I could never have articulated if I was trying to write it. And I wanted a way to capture that and make sure that none of that got lost.
I always say I would love to hire someone to go through all of my Otter recordings and pick out all of the gems and turn them into content because speaking through things is absolutely my thing too.
I wonder, do you know if you have a defined throat center?
Mari: Yes, I do.
Chantelle: Yeah, yeah, I do too. I feel like it's possibly a defined throat thing.
Mari: That's what I was kind of thinking too when we were talking about it. I was like, I bet that has to do with your throat. And also maybe your head space is a little bit.
Chantelle: Yeah. Mine, my head and ajna are also defined. You?
Mari: Okay. No, my head and Ajnar are completely open.
Chantelle: [00:16:00] Interesting. Yeah, I tend to attract a ton of clients who have open centers there,
Mari: which makes sense if yours are defined,
Chantelle: but I have like almost everything defined. So I do notice a couple of little patterns like, I get a lot of manifesting generators, a lot of projectors, a lot of undefined or open the combination of head and ajna together, both of those.
Usually my clients are both of those undefined
Mari: or open. I'm curious.
Have you worked with a 5/2 before? Cause 5/2s I think are like 3 percent of the population.
Chantelle: Yeah, I can tell you it's been really tough to find people to interview who are 5/2s in the show.
Mari: Yeah, I bet.
Chantelle: I haven't always used human design explicitly in my process.
And still now I'd say it's about 5, 10 percent of my work with clients. I'm into it if they're into it. So if they know their chart already or they're curious about knowing their chart, then I work into it.
I've had a lot of clients where I don't know their design because that was [00:17:00] before I was making it a little bit more visible in my strategy, so I don't know of any 5/2s that I've worked with.
I have definitely worked with a lot of 5/1s, which is a super common profile. 6/2s are volunteering themselves in droves for this show. Like it's, it's overwhelming actually, I've had to move half of them over to next season because I'm like, I would have an entire pop up season of just 6/2s.
It's just interesting, the patterns. That's why I started the show because I was curious what other patterns I might unearth just by talking about it.
I think you're the second or possibly third 5/2 I've interviewed. And the pattern I'm noticing so far is that you are very deliberate and very like, not slow, but like, you kind of have this ability to, well, I don't know, like you, you have little pauses throughout in a really grounding way.
And I'm an impatient person, but listening to you speak, I'm comfortable. [00:18:00] You make me comfortable with your pace, which is kind of a cool thing. And when I think back to the other five twos that I've spoken with and two fives, actually, honestly it's a really similar kind
of feel.
Mari: That's really cool and interesting to hear.
I was getting a vision of like, a turtle, going into his shell and then coming back out and going in, like a roly poly kind of situation where it's like, we just need to go inside for a second. Like, okay, we can come back out now. From the energetic perspective for me too, that's just really cool to hear and have reflected back as well.
Chantelle: With the 5/2 profile , there is a lot of balance right between the two wanting solitude and then the five wanting to solve problems and get into inspiration mode. And so maybe there is a little bit of this continuous back and forth that's happening and that expresses itself in this methodical kind of process.
Would you say that you're deliberate? Does that ring true for you?
Mari: Yes I, I absolutely agree. I do feel like there's stuff [00:19:00] that I'm able to see everything from a lot of different perspectives and I'm really able to put things together the smoothest path in ways to get there.
I would say that sometimes, especially when I wasn't living in more alignment with my human design, then the 5/2 feels more like a push and pull. Whereas when you're really working with it and working with your human design in general, then it feels a lot more of like a balance and it moves a lot easier and it's just smoother in general.
Rather than having that like push and pull of like, I want to do this, but I want to do this. Yeah. Because they are so conflicting for the 5/2.
Chantelle: Right. And the way that you described that, and you even, if someone's listening to the audio and not the video, you did this motion with fists colliding, like that conflict. It sounds like that brought up that not self theme of frustration for you at certain points. Tell me about [00:20:00] the not self that you felt around that.
Mari: So having the not self theme of frustration, I, and it's funny because when I am going through anything that is definitely not in alignment.
Even if I don't realize at the time I'm so frustrated. And I would always say that before I even really knew my human design. When I had my first human design reading and they're like, Yeah. Like that's why you keep saying you're frustrated. And it's so true for people because the people who have like the not self theme of bitter, they'll always be like, Oh, I'm feeling so bitter.
And it's hilarious that we just always use that word before you even know what your human design is. And so now anytime I feel myself saying like, I'm feeling really frustrated, I have to say, okay, that means I'm doing something that is in my not self theme. So what is that thing that's making me so frustrated?
That's not in alignment. What do I need to change? And that can look like anything [00:21:00] and everything, but we can go back to the example of like, when I was doing marketing every single day, I was feeling frustrated with my clients, with what I was doing with the work and I just don't really remember having more than like a day at a time where I didn't feel frustrated.
And now with my business, I've been doing this for about almost four years now. And now I can say there are very few moments where I feel frustrated with my business. And if I do, it's literally, it's usually because there's like one little tweak that I need to make to a program or I'm doing something wrong with how I'm operating on my social media and like I need to find a smoother, better way.
Chantelle: Good for you that you have figured all that out, for the most part.
Mari: It's amazing once you figure it out. Yeah.
Chantelle: It is a bit of a journey though, I hear what you're saying. Frustration is my not self theme as well, and the closest word that I also use is annoyed. So, [00:22:00] yeah.
Annoyed and frustrated to me are like, basically the same, and that's, that's my tell,
Mari: like, I can resonate with that. Because I would probably say annoyed more when it comes to people. Yes.
Chantelle: Yeah. Agreed. Yeah. Situations are frustrating. People are annoying.
Mari: Yes. Yes. Oh my gosh. I feel so seen right now.
Chantelle: You're, you're a Manifesting Generator too, right?
Mari: Yes.
Chantelle: Even though we don't have either of the profile lines in common, there is that shared experience, that commonality. As much as I can get recognition from reading something about human design, it's also just deeply satisfying to meet somebody where there's that recognition of, oh yeah, we have this in our chart and it feels like this.
Mari: Yeah, it is because it gives you so much more understanding of how they operate. And even when you don't think have things similar with other people, you can still totally understand their system better and how they think through things, how their energy works, just their whole process when you know their human design, because you [00:23:00] can be like, Oh, you're a Projector. This makes so much more sense to me now. Right. Yeah. That's really helpful. It's yeah. It's so powerful because then you're able to kind of work with them more and meet them where they're at. And it just makes life so much easier.
Chantelle: Yeah. Maybe this will resonate with you. I I've often said that once I know someone in my life's human design chart, I can, if I am annoyed with them, be annoyed with the chart instead in a sense, like, I'll be like, Oh, this is just their this coming out. It's pushing up against this aspect of me.
It helps me to reframe that issue that I'm having or whatever conflict is coming up by understanding where that behavior is motivated by or coming from.
Mari: I mean, it gives our human brain more of an understanding and comprehension with other people, and it takes it a little bit more, I feel like, out of our own scope of like everything centered around me.
[00:24:00] Mm-Hmm. . And it's the same way with the trauma work that I do.
When I see someone who's in a fight trauma response, I'm like, oh, yeah, okay. This makes a lot more sense. Mm-Hmm. , instead of just attaching stories to it. And really putting it on us and being like, Oh, what does this mean about me because they're acting a certain way. Which is funny because that takes us back to the
Chantelle: five line. I
Chantelle: was just going to say with the five line then of that fix it like energy. Is there anything right now that is coming up as a pattern of like things that you're noticing that you're fixing, or that you're ready to be inspirational about?
Mari: Oof. For this, knowing when and when not to fix things has been a learning curve? That sometimes that looks like now, especially with what I do as a coach and healer, I have to make sure like I'm not doing that to just everyone in my life.
Sometimes when my friends are [00:25:00] going through things. Saying, do you want me to be supportive right now or do you want feedback and help? Like what are you looking for? And sometimes that does look like them saying like, I just want support right now. And I'm like, cool.
Yeah. Now I know. But I have had to really put up boundaries with myself of how I use my fix it energy because I really try in my personal life to not bring that into my relationships without people asking and inviting for it.
Years ago, that probably was not the case. So I feel like it has honestly helped my relationships a lot more, but that was something I had to bring a lot of attention to, not only for my relationships' sake, but for my sake, because you can't just be like fixing things for people all the time, that's exhausting.
And then people like, look at you as the fixer. And they always want to go to you for it. So for example, with my parents, I am like the go to child when anything is wrong, whether it's like, we forgot this at the grocery store, or we need help with [00:26:00] our passwords and with technology and like, this is happening.
Call Mari. Like that was always the case. You guys will probably think this is too far, but like, I started charging them when they would ask me questions. I was like 5 for a password reset. 15 for technology help. Like I literally sent out a text and was like, FYI, for everyone in the family, these are my prices moving forward.
If you want help for like your gift shopping, because I would always buy everyone's gifts for my entire extended family, for everyone in my family. I was like, these are the price points and there's a late fee if you need it rushed. Like, I know that that's so extreme, but it worked.
Chantelle: It worked in that they started paying it or it worked in that they started asking less?
Mari: So now they like actually try to figure it out themselves first and usually they do and if they are really struggling then they'll reach out but like I, it was to the point where I was getting texts like once a day. I'm like, I can't keep stopping my life for a half an hour to help you figure this [00:27:00] out every single day.
So, a lot of that came down to boundaries when it comes to the fixing it thing. Yeah. I mean, I don't usually charge them now, but like they've gotten so much better and that was the whole point of it. Yeah.
And then when it comes to the inspiration, I'm feeling so inspired right now in my business, which feels really good, but it also feels very draining on my body.
And so I do have to, like I said, really right now, especially keep taking so much time out. And I also have other creative outlets I love to use. Like I fully believe in having so much inspiration and things that light you up that are outside of money, outside of your business. So like, I love DIY projects and pottery and like all of these fun creative things that I get to do that feel inspiring to me and energize me.
Chantelle: Line fives are so good at boundaries. Like I could never really, I, yeah, at least I, I mean, maybe I could, maybe I could train myself to, but it definitely doesn't come naturally.
Not that [00:28:00] it, I'm not saying that it came naturally to you. I'm sure that took some finessing of wording for sure.
Mari: It took years to get good at boundaries,
Chantelle: It's maybe part of the five journey that it's something you become wise about as you go.
Your story was fascinating to hear, and I'm so glad you shared it.
Mari: I think I don't know if it's something that boundaries really comes naturally to a lot of people. Unless. You know, you can be like overly good at boundaries or you can be really not good at boundaries. It can go one way or the other. And so it is about finding that balance.
And I'd rather over correct and then have to pull back than under correct when learning how to make boundaries. So I agree. I think that is probably a big part of the Line 5 journey. It's getting good at boundaries because if you're not, you're just constantly giving and that's exhausting.
Chantelle: Mm hmm. What advice would you give to a 5/2?
Mari: The advice I would give is to take the time to get to know [00:29:00] yourself on a deeper level so that you can know when you start getting more into those little energies. Like you can just sense the difference in yourself when you are over giving or when you are really being projected on.
When you are ready for hermit mode, because even knowing the difference of when someone's even starting to project on you versus getting to the point where they're like really projecting onto you can give you that difference of like, okay, I want to pull back right now because I can see where this is going to go.
And if I pull back right now, we can still save this. And it can help you find more of that balance. So it's not such a big tidal wave all the time and over correcting all the time, because it really is about finding that balance between the five and the two, not living in the push and pull and like letting the push and pull take you away.
Chantelle: That's going to [00:30:00] be
so helpful for people to hear. It actually makes me feel a little better about not being able to find so many five twos to chat with, because this is like really solid advice. I can send people to this episode and they'll be good. So let's flow into our closing ritual .
I'm holding the deck created by Christina from Glow Glow Juice HD. And when you're ready, you and I will take a deep breath in together
and let that release.
The card that I've drawn today reads, It is safe to do things my way and on my own time. I know my time to shine will come. How can I boldly claim my own space today?
Mari: Oh, I love that question. I feel like I needed that question, honestly, today. I was trying to take space before we got on this call to let myself have that process space and I don't feel like it was enough.
So I think it's really calling me to this evening, take a time out and take two or three hours to myself. Instead of just [00:31:00] trying to do like another 30 minute increment. Yeah. I think I do need more of that space today. And so that card really resonates with me right now.
Chantelle: Perfect. I'm so glad. Once you've taken that time and space and you're ready to take inquiries again, where can people connect with you?
Mari: Yes. You guys can find me on Instagram @marileigh B M a R I L E I G H and at marileigh.Com. You can also find my podcast via that. And yeah, follow along, send me a message. And if you're a 5/2 also, I'd love to hear from you because I feel like we could probably really connect. And there's so few of us out there.
Chantelle: That makes total sense. We'll send them your way.
Mari: Perfect. They won't be judged by not responding on time.
